Back in June I reviewed The Office of Lost and Found by Vincent Holland-Keen. At the time this quirky, off the wall detective debut was only available as an e-book. Today the following press release popped into my inbox and I thought it would be nice to share. The Office of Lost and Found’ is now available in hard copy. Published as an ebook through Anarchy Press, VHK has now made the book available through Lulu for those who still crave the pleasure of a physical book. Available now as paperback with a version of the ebook cover and as a hardback with the original ‘logo’ cover, these editions of ‘The Office of Lost and Found’ include notes and sketches by the author not previously released. Paperback: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback/the-office-of-lost-and-found—paperback-artwork-edition/16801793 Hardback/Casewrap: http://www.lulu.com/product/hardcover/the-office-of-lost-and-found—logo-cover—casewrap/16534562 eBook Link (Anarchy Books): http://anarchy-books.com/books/the-office-of-lost-and-found/  

Welcome To Low Town Here, the criminal is king. The streets are filled with the screeching of fish hags, the cries of swindled merchants, the inviting murmurs of working girls. Here, people can disappear, and the lacklustre efforts of the guard ensure they are never found. Warden is an ex-soldier who has seen the worst men have to offer; now a narcotics dealer with a rich, bloody past and a way of inviting danger. You’d struggle to someone with a soul as dark and troubled as his. Bu then a missing child, murdered and horribly mutilated, is discovered in an alley. And then another. With a mind as sharp as a blade and an old but powerful friend in the city, he’s the only man with a hope of finding the killer.  If the killer doesn’t find him first. Those of you who have been following The Eloquent Page for a while may remember that The Straight Razor Cure was on my list of books I was looking forward to reading in 2011. This week, I finally managed to get my hands on a copy and was able to see if it was a worthy inclusion on that list or…

LET BATTLE COMMENCE… Thanks to his father’s gambling debts, young Jack Keats finds himself on the streets trying to graft enough coin to keep him and his two younger brothers fed. When a daring bank robbery goes awry, Jack narrowly escapes the scaffold on to be pressed into the Royal Aerostatical Navy. Assigned to the most useless airship in the fleet, serving under a captain who’s is most probably mad, Jack seems to be bound for almost certain death in the far-away deserts of Cassarabia.  Meanwhile on the other side of the world, Omar ibn Barir, the slave of a rich merchant lord, is unexpectedly freed and enters into the service of the Caliph’s military forces – just as war is brewing. Two very similar young men prepare to face each other across senseless field of war. But is Omar the enemy, or is Jack’s true nemesis the sickness at the heart of the Caliph’s court? If Jack and his shipmates can discover what Cassarabia’s aggressive new regime is trying to conceal, he might survive the most horrific of wars and clear his family’s name. If not… I have to admit that prior to picking up Jack Cloudie I hadn’t…

Occasionally I manage to convince Mrs Cheesecake to write a review for me. This is her latest review. I’d just like to take a moment to thank her for her work. The enduring love story of Anthony and Cleopatra has been retold many times throughout history. In Queen of Kings, Headley has given this famous tale a darker and more mythological twist. We join the lovers at the point in history when Octavian Caesar, great nephew of the late Julius, is camped outside the city of Alexandria. Octavian sends a false message to Cleopatra’s beloved Anthony and he kills himself believing his queen has betrayed him. On discovering the deceit, Cleopatra is driven to making an impossible deal, and uses dark magic to summon one of the old gods, the goddess Sekhmet, and strikes a bargain – her soul for her husband’s life. Sadly, through an unfortunate accident, the resurrected Anthony dies again.  One could say, to lose your husband once is unfortunate; to lose him again is careless. As is often the case when humans make deals with deities, the consequences of the bargain are never fully realised until it is too late. The last pharaoh of Egypt becomes…

Renegade City. Futurist Gothika. Mecca of the damned. Where uber rock-band, Origin, is deified and the world’s dark sub-cultures coexist under the umbrella faith of ‘Belief’. But Roses, the great, Gothic messiah is dead, the tribes are in turmoil, and Renegade’s own home-bred rebels, the Drifters, are quickly becoming a law unto themselves. The last thing that Druid, Origin’s drummer and reclusive high lord of the Drathcor, wants to do is hunt his brother’s killer, especially since he’s not sure of foul play, or even the purity of his motives. Against all of his expectations, however, he is soon embroiled with the underbelly of dissension, dirty politics, and a non-believer as jaded with Renegade’s great and secret show as he is – a black-eyed girl named Jezebel.  Druid is tasked with saving the whole city. Street punk, Jezebel will settle for saving her on brother. Ever since Harish in touch with his inner-animal and left her with the scars to prove it, she has made her quest to return him to the fold. One bleak winter’s night, she succeeds in tracking him to the festering Gothic ruin of the south watchtower, home to the very same ghosts that Druid is…

The Beast is loose. After countless years trapped inside the World House, its sinister prisoner is loose and pure evil has been loosed upon the world. Now the motley band of explorers, treasure hunters and thrill seekers must unit to imprison it once more.   Nothing to it… A little less than a month ago I was sat in the audience for the raffle at Alt.Fiction and Restoration by Guy Adams came up as one of the prizes. The affable Mr Adams was hosting said raffle and when his latest book appeared he made the suggestion that as this was a direct sequel to The World House it might be a good idea not to jump straight into Restoration but try is predecessor first. Never one to shy away from a challenge I immediately decided to ignore his advice and read Restoration without reading The World House first. I was curious to see if it was possible to read this sequel without any prior knowledge. I was willing to accept that I may miss some of the references to the first novel but I was still wanted to see if I could enjoy this second novel under its own merit. Set apart…

Thomas Locke can find anything. You know the hurricane that hit a while back? Word is he found the butterfly that started it. So, when a desperate Veronica Drysdale hires Locke to find her missing husband, it makes perfect sense. Except the world of Thomas Locke doesn’t make sense. It puts monsters under the bed, makes stars fall from the sky and leads little children to worship the marvels of road-works. This world also hides from Veronica a past far darker and stranger than she could ever have imagined. To learn the truth, Veronica is going to have to lose everything. And that’s where Locke’s shadowy business partner Lafarge comes in… Before we begin I have a couple of questions. How do you feel about novels that feature a character reincarnated as a toaster? Would you have a problem if the toaster was called Leonard? If you have issues with either of these questions I would advise reading no further. I can tell you now, that this novel is not for you. Perhaps you might wish to consider doing something else instead? I’ve been told gardening is a very popular pastime? Ahh your still here, jolly good. You’re interested aren’t…

You may have heard that the world was supposed to end last weekend. Based on the fact that you are reading this post, I think we can all safely assume that it didn’t. It struck me that predictions can be, at best, awfully fickle things. If only there was a book that didn’t mess about, something that took all the guess work out of things and just made The Apocalypse simple. According to the Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter – the world’s only totally reliable guide to the future – the world will end on a Saturday . Next Saturday, in fact. Just after tea… Good Omens was originally published way back in the halcyon days of nineteen ninety. At the time, I was a thoroughly impressionable sixteen year old and I think, in hindsight, that I can now squarely point the finger of blame for my obsession with the end of the world on this novel. The premise is simple, the Antichrist is born on Earth and following a baby switch that quickly devolves into farce, he ends up with a family in a sleepy little village in England rather than as the son of a US…

By way of some sort of explanation – In an effort to expand the my reading horizons I’ve decided that it was high time read something that was not a novel. Quirk Books very kindly provided what I think is some sort of self help/how to guide? The results, I think, speak for themselves…. Pirates, by nature, aren’t terribly literate. As a consequence, no book can hope to fully prepare the pampered, modern-day layabout for the lusty life of a pirate. This book,however, will put you on the right path – the path to adeventure, treasure, glory, mystery, and, every so often, the bottom of a barrel of rum. Avast me hearties, tis I – Captain Pablo Cheesecake on the good ship The Eloquent Page. Being as I am the very definition of a modern-day layabout I knew that this book would assist in answering all my pirate related questions. At may surprise all of ye unworthy swabs but since I was knee-high to a Jolly Roger I have always been a fan of all things piratical. I still remember fondly the first time I marveled at Burt Lancaster swashing his buckle in The Crimson Pirate. Since that day, I have…

Please note this review contains minor spoilers if you haven’t read book one in the trilogy, The Sword of Albion.  Also you are missing a real treat. Alone and on the run, Elizabethan England’s greatest spy must defeat a dark and bloody plot. Or die… The Scar Crow Men by Mark Chadbourn is the second novel in the Swords of Albion series. It sees the return of Will Swyfte, gentleman spy, and his ongoing battle with the dark forces that threaten Great Britain during the reign of Elizabeth the First. Two years have passed since the events in the first novel and Swyfte is facing troubles both at home and abroad. Different factions vie for Elizabeth’s favour and in the midst of all this political maneuvering one of Will closest friends is killed. While members of the royal household continue to plot and scheme the Unseelie Court, the Fay, have begun to tear down the magical defenses that protect all humans from their evil. They have unleashed the Scar Crow Men to help bring about a shift in power that will allow them control everything. There are a couple of things that I think elevates Mark Chadbourn’s writing beyond the…

They came from the North, and the land fell. Kell’s resistance is driving the fiends from the land. But now a far greater power has come into play. Please note this review contains some minor spoilers if you have not read the first two parts of The Clockwork Vampire Chronicles. I have thought about this long and hard and I have come to a shocking conclusion – I hate Andy Remic.  Why? Because he is just such a supremely talented sod. He has proven that he can turn his hand to science fiction, horror and fantasy. As an aside – I have a sneaking suspicion that he is attempting to become the king of all genre fiction. Every time I think he can’t possibly top his last literary effort he goes ahead and does just that. Recently I read and reviewed Serial Killers Incorporated, and was impressed with its dark brutality. A scant few weeks has passed and he has yet another novel ready to assault the senses of an unsuspecting public. The latest addition to his ever-growing canon of work, Vampire Warlords, is the third book in The Clockwork Vampire Chronicles. This novel picks up the story in the…

A dead hero opens his eyes. To his horror, he finds he has been raised to serve as the undead minion of a desperate necromancer called Mordius. Our hero’s body has been stolen from a battlefield contested by two kingdoms that have been at war for generations. No one knows why warfare is now the way of life, but what is apparent is that the dark forces vie for dominion over the entire realm. When it comes to fantasy my needs are simple – heroes and villains, kingdom versus kingdom, gods and monsters. I’m looking for groups of disparate characters thrown into a situation that they can’t control. Add in a quest to locate a magical macguffin that will solve all their problems and I’m sold and I’m pleased to say that this book covers all these bases. Necromancer’s Gambit by A J Dalton is the first book in the Flesh and Bone trilogy. In it the reader is introduced to the inhabitants of the warring kingdoms, Dur Memnos and Accritania.  The necromancer, Mordius, is searching for a mystical object that will help to end the war and bring about a much needed peace. Saltar, the hero raised from the dead, makes…

Kings and queens, knights and renegades, liars, lords and honest men. All will play the Game of Thrones. Summers span decades. Winters can last a lifetime. And the struggle for the Iron Throne has begun. It will stretch from the south, where the heat breeds plot, lusts and intrigues; to the vast frozen north where a 700-foot wall of ice protects the kingdom from the dark forces that lie beyond. The Game of Thrones. You win, or you die. I’m not adverse to a massive doorstop of a novel. Peter F Hamilton, Stephen King, Frank Herbert have all written huge books that I have not only read but re-read numerous times. When it comes to A Game of Thrones by George R. R. Martin things are just slightly different. I have been promising myself that I would read the first book in the A Song of Ice and Fire saga for a long time. So long in fact that it became something of a personal Moby Dick, my literary equivalent of a great white whale. It got to the stage where I was a little intimidated by the whole thing and I never thought I would get around to reading…